You met someone who seems perfect in every way, right from the beginning. Your coffee date extended well past sunset. They laughed at your quirky humor. Neither one of you spilled anything on yourselves. Great.
The second date was just as magical, and now you find yourself thinking of “me and them” as “we.” You can envision you and your partner being in a committed relationship, and you don’t want to blow it.
So what should you avoid? Take a hint from these dating tips for new relationships.
1. Stalking Their Phone Not-So-Subtly
Sure, stalker movies keep the Lifetime Movie Network in business. Your date might even dig that sort of drama on television. In real life? Going through your sweetheart’s personal belongings is invasive and scary as hell.
Of course, you don’t have to physically break into a person’s home to still give them the creeps. There are other things that guys do (all the time) that compromise a potential relationship. Here’s an example of what not to do.
Don’t like every picture of them once you become social media buds. Yes, our connected society makes it easy to research people online — many would argue, too easy. But something’s a bit weird about a follower who thinks everything you post is perfect. One of the top dating tips for new relationships is respecting their space.
2. Becoming Their Personal Consultant
Hopefully, your first date quickly progressed beyond, “So what do you do for a living?” It’s far more enjoyable to discuss your true passion in life than what you do to pay the rent.
Maybe your date shared with you that they’ve dreamed of living off the grid, and your inner pioneer said, “I’ve met my soulmate!” That said, jibing with their vibe doesn’t give you the right to become their personal consultant.
It’s one thing to say, “I’d love to read something you’ve written,” to a date who confesses they dream of the freelance life. It’s quite another to suggest unwarranted advice and suggestions because you want to help. It’s quite quite another to ask them to quit their day job and move into your spare bedroom so they can work on their screenplay.
3. Divulging All Your Drama Right Away
The path of true love never did run smooth, at least, according to some deceased poet or another. Unless you’re brand new to the dating scene, chances are, you carry some baggage.
It’s okay to at least acknowledge the baggage in vague terms. It’s in poor taste to break it out for show-and-tell on date night. Of course, you owe it to your date to divulge relevant information.
If what you have to say is pertinent to your partner’s health, it’s important to have that conversation before you move forward with anything. You don’t, however, need to reveal the intimate details of how your alcoholic ex-partner sabotaged your chance at happiness. A little mystery is okay.
4. Failing to Talk About Your Sexual Preferences
Everyone has different preferences in the bedroom. When the time comes to get intimate, communicate what you want and ask your partner to do the same. Communication will keep things comfortable as you enter this admittedly sensitive area of a new relationship.
So what shouldn’t you do? You shouldn’t try anything too risqué unless you’ve received verbal consent. Talk about what each of you enjoy beforehand – both a sexy form of foreplay and an important precursor to the main event.
You’ll know what they’re into, they’ll know what you’re into, and neither of you will overstep any boundaries.
5. Picking Out China Patterns Too Soon
Perhaps you two connected because you were both tired of playing games. You want to settle down in a committed relationship. But even if your partner desires the same thing as you, going from zero to sixty comes off as desperate. At best, you make them feel uncomfortable by forcing them to apply the brakes. At worst, you scare them away.
There’s no set timeframe for discussing cohabitation or marriage. That said, you should try to date for at least two months before popping the question, and even that is an incredibly short amount of time.
Form a Lasting Bond
If you met someone you think is “the one,” you don’t want to blow your chances with a careless mistake. Follow these top dating tips for new relationships, giving your relationship a chance to blossom into something beautiful.